I heard that the Reverend Billy Graham recently joined First Baptist Church, Spartanburg. Why, you ask? I have no idea. Is that a marketing move? Are you allowed to "move your letter" only for publicity? (By the way, how funny is the phrase "move your letter" in the nerdy baptist world? What does that even mean? Is it like an actual hand written letter or is it like a high school letter you get for playing sports....you could pin your Sunday School Perfect Attendance button to it. Could Churches be weirder??) How nervous would you be as a pastor if Billy Graham was sitting in your congregation? I dont care who you are, that's scary.
Do you think First Baptist made Billy Graham attend the mandatory membership class? Could you imagine that? Did they slowly walk through what it truly means to be a Christian? This is probably how the final question went:
Old Lady With Blue Hair: "umm, Billy...can I call you Billy or do you prefer William? Well, ummm, let me teach you how to confidently share your faith with others"
Billy Graham: "yeah, I think I'm good on that one"
OLWBH: (ignoring him) "I like to draw a picture of a huge cavern seperating us from God"
Billy Graham: "oh really, I like to have huge crusades where millions come to Christ"
OLWBH: "well I guess that's an idea...you could also teach about the 4 spiritual laws over coffee"
Billy Graham: "oh yeah, I've used that with every US President since Harry Truman. You know, when I was hospitalized in 1976 three president called in one day to wish me well."
Old Lady: "yeah, yeah...don't go changing the subject, we've got a lot of info to cover. Where were we...oh yeah, let's talk about when you can volunteer for the nursery."
Billy Graham: "Well, this Sunday I will be speaking at the the $27 million Billy Graham library in Charlotte. After that I am accepting my 2nd Congressional Gold Metal in DC, then I'll be gone the next weekend as I'm being inducted into the Gospel Music Hall of Fame, then I'm being Knighted, then I'm speaking at Samford where an honorary chair is being named in my honor, the list goes on for a while.....but maybe I can play lead guitar in the band one week.
Billy Graham is the man. Do you know the United States Postal Service has said he is one of the few people, along with the current president, who can be delivered mail that simply reads his name and country: "Billy Graham, America". I guarantee I will not receive your letter if you send it to "Josh Ridings, America". That letter is going in the garbage. He's a big deal. I hope I see him at Wades after church one week....i'll hand him a demo.
8 comments:
This was hilarious!
your blog is one of my fave pastimes while i am working really hard and making the world a better place with aromas.
You took my advice. Conversations are comedy gold.
freakin awesome. i love it.
I was wondering if Billy told you whether or not he'd be coming to the Wednesday night church dinners. They're usually tasty. It would be a good way for him to meet people in the congregation and ultimately get involved.
You're the awesomest ever.
Lol. Wow, Josh. You're the awesomest blogger ever. lol.
So, I think you should TOTALLY hit Billy up in the Wades with your demo. Wow. Wades sounds good right now... Lol.
GREAT blog! SOOOOO true!!
David G
Josh, how have we not talked about this? We were at First Baptist that Sunday because a bunch of my family was in town. I had to hold Jason back from walking down the aisle because he wanted to be able to say he "walked down front" the week Billy joined the church.
Before you hand over your demo to Billy Graham, you should definitely record your own version of "Just As I Am."
Post a Comment